Surround Yourself

Surround Yourself With What You Want to Be

It seems that everywhere I go, I hear the phrase, “you are the average of the five people you hang out with most”. It’s very common among entrepreneurs, especially. I absolutely agree with this sentiment. The people that surround you greatly influence who you are as a person.

However, many people hear this advice and take a narrow view of it. They are thinking about one aspect of their life, maybe starting a business/side hustle, maybe building their frugality muscle. The immediate thought is, “I need to find five friends to hang out with that are phenomenal at that!”

The problem is, focusing on just one specific area of our lives and forgetting everything else is detrimental to my goal of being happy. I also want to be emotionally intelligent. I want to have adventures. I want to be around people that expand my sense of humor. The list goes on and if I spent all of my time with people that only ticked the box of being super frugal, I don’t think I’d be fulfilled.

So how is one supposed to take action on this advice? Well, first, don’t ditch the friends that make you happy in pursuit of success in one area. Of course, if a friend is a drain on you, doesn’t respect you, or is otherwise detrimental to your happiness, that’s a different story and you do need to move on. But go ahead and keep the good ones!

As for the area you are interested in improving, we live in an AMAZING time. We have more access to content through blogs, podcasts and online video than ever before. You don’t need to replace your five best friends, just replace the content that you consume. There are good people out there creating amazing podcasts, blogs, and videos, giving you the ability to hang out with them, virtually! Just surrounding yourself with content has the ability to shift your mindset and truly realize that your goals are achievable.

I want to share with you a few blogs and podcasts that I surround myself with that have created a shift in my thinking.

Online Business/Lifestyle Design



Real Estate Investing

Choosing your current priorities is important in this exercise.. I definitely have more interests than just those four areas.. In 5 years, perhaps I will have traded one of those for a cooking podcast or an exercise blog.. I still cook and exercise currently, but I don’t have the bandwidth to really dive deep into those areas, surround myself with them in order to truly progress in them..

I have chosen my priorities for now, in an effort to grow in those areas to a point that matches my goals for those areas.

So what areas of your life are you focusing on and what blogs, podcasts, and videos do you surround yourself with to help you shift your mindset in those areas?

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10 thoughts on “Surround Yourself With What You Want to Be

  1. Even Steven August 25, 2014 at 2:03 pm

    I do my best to stick with FI and Early Retirement blogs like MMM, I listen mostly to Dave Ramsey for my pay off your debt stupid. When I want to eat healthy I go Paleo in podcasts/websites like Rob Wolff.
    Even Steven recently posted: 4 Things You Must Do to Retire EarlyMy Profile

    • Mr NYBudget August 25, 2014 at 3:12 pm

      I am very close to diving deeper into my food choices. I have done well with finding cheap eats – but I’d love to learn more about being healthy.

  2. Justin @ Root of Good August 28, 2014 at 4:06 pm

    Great points. I’m one of those “power of positive thinking” guys too. If you surround yourself with people (virtually or in real life) that are positive and focused on things that are important to you, too, then you’ll be way more likely to stay on the path to your goals. Not that everyone must be single minded uni-dimensional group thinkers, but achieving FI, building wealth through real estate or cutting expenses and living a frugal lifestyle would be really hard if everyone around you didn’t share at least some of your goals.
    Justin @ Root of Good recently posted: July 2014 Financial UpdateMy Profile

    • Mr NYBudget August 28, 2014 at 4:22 pm

      That’s very true, Justin. It always seems to come back to priorities, doesn’t it!

  3. Stefanie @ The Broke and Beautiful Life August 29, 2014 at 8:12 am

    I have a super diversified group of friends which helps a lot- Ukrainians (all of which have different professions), actors/artists, runners, bloggers… The other thing important to me is to surround myself with people who are smarter than me, or at least expose myself to them. Love watching TED talks and I’m slightly obsessed with Stephen Colbert 🙂
    Stefanie @ The Broke and Beautiful Life recently posted: Who are YOUR Joneses? Today’s Lifestyle InflationMy Profile

    • Mr NYBudget August 29, 2014 at 9:34 am

      Nice! TED Talks are a great source – good call!

  4. Andrew@LivingRichCheaply August 29, 2014 at 12:46 pm

    I just joined Biggerpockets. Thanks for the inspiration…never thought owning rental properties was possible living NYC until I read your experience as well as FI Fighter. I’ve also always been a big MMM fan, and have been very interested about financial freedom or early retirement…living in NYC is an obstacle though.

    • Mr NYBudget August 29, 2014 at 9:07 pm

      Of course! I have a couple more real estate investing posts lined up starting in a week or two!

  5. Simon September 6, 2014 at 2:31 pm

    Am at that point in life where my focus is simplicity, a more present and focused life and Zenhabits(Leo Babauta) offers great pointers in that direction. James Altucher’s -Altucher Confidential. I read his book Choose Yourself and it completely changed the way I take on life 🙂
    Simon recently posted: Travelocity Rewards American Express Card ReviewMy Profile

    • Mr NYBudget September 8, 2014 at 6:10 am

      That’s awesome – I think it will be a couple of years, but I definitely plan on focusing on simplicity in my life, once I am set up with my side hustles and investments a bit more. Nice suggestions!

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